Changes

As I looked out the window this evening, I realized that I am not who I want to be. My kids and husband were outside washing the cars and I was inside cleaning the house. I used to be with my kids all of the time. Somewhere along the way, I have lost what is important. I think it has been the fight that I have been pursuing to adopt my oldest daughter. I always felt like I had to prove that I was a good mom to everyone else when the only person I had to prove it to was Pumpkin Pie. She was the one that counted! I have come to the point where I thought I had to do it all. My kids had to have the best and the house has to be clean all of the time and the kids have to always look perfect, etc...the list goes on and on of things that I started assuming that I needed to do.
I have decided, through my jealousy of my husband getting to be outside with the kids, that it is high time that I re-prioritize my life. I want my kids to remember the things I done with them. I don't want them to be comparing parents with friends later on and the only thing they have to say about me is, "my mom kept the house clean." So if you come over and my house isn't clean or my laundry is piled up or my kids are eating cereal/frozen pizza/sandwich for the third night in a row, know that it is because we have more important things to do, like play Barbies or see who can jump higher on the trampoline or who can spin on the tire swing the most without puking. And when you see me at Walmart and my shoes don't match and my kids don't look like they have been bathed that day, simply know that I love my kids and I want them to remember the fun times, not that they got bathed every night. God gives us blessings every day and sometimes they are hard to see when you are looking everywhere but right under your nose!